Can I Recover From Narcissistic Abuse?
Recovery from narcissistic abuse is painful but not impossible. Seeking the help of a psychologist can be one method of finding relief. However psychology only focuses on self-esteem, healing the inner child, and the mental and emotional aspects of healing from narcissistic abuse. All worthy therapeutic avenues. However, narcissistic abuse goes much deeper than that. Traditional methods do not address the powerful psychic attachment that is so hard to break away from.
A narcissistic relationship is one in which one person in the relationship is incapable of loving the other partner because they are totally absorbed with themselves. It is one in which your partner makes you feel that there is nothing you can do that is good enough for him or her.
It is a relationship where your self-esteem is torn apart day by day and you don’t even realize it because you are too busy trying to do whatever will make your partner love you. But it is a waste of time. A narcissist in incapable of loving anyone and as odd as it seems they really don’t even love themselves.
The following is not an exhaustive list of the traits of a narcissist. This is a simplified explanation of certain signs that will help you to identify if you are involved with a narcissist.
1. The most tell tale sign of a narcissist is that they do not have the capacity to empathize. In other words, someone with empathy can feel what you are feeling and understand. They can “feel your pain” and they care. On the other hand a narcissist cannot feel your pain.
2. They have an overriding need to be the center of attention. They must be appreciated and if you do not appreciate them the way they think you should they will take their anger out on you.
Are you the type of person who believes that you should love unconditionally? And that the unconditional love you give your partner should be returned? That’s the ideal, isn’t it? It would be wonderful if we could all reciprocate. The reality is that if you are the type that will feel sorry for your partner and have the urge to fix them or please them unreasonably then you may be a real target of the narcissist.
In order to survive the break up of a narcissistic relationship you need to be prepared with the hard cold truth of what is going on. Your partner is incapable of caring about you or this relationship. That is so hard to understand. That you’ve been with someone and loved this person and it is impossible for them to love you, even though they may have been able to fool you into thinking they did love you. In this case, it really isn’t “you” it really is “them.”
When you have come to the end of a narcissistic relationship it will be very painful and confusing. That statement is harsh but it is true and you must be prepared for some of the things that your narcissistic partner will do. But, you can survive this and you will love again.
When a normal relationship comes to an end it is one of the hardest things we have to do. But ending a narcissistic relationship is twice as hard and can even be downright nasty. If you were legally married then divorcing a narcissist might really be a nightmare.
If you are the one ending the relationship then it’s a sure sign you are healthier than you think. Now you just have to find a way to stay strong.
It may seem like the impossible thing to do but you MUST break all contact with the narcissist when you break up with them.
They are master manipulators, con men and women whose sole purpose is to keep their power over you. Without that power source they will move on to someone else very quickly and you will be free.
They might call, text, email you constantly begging for you to take them back or see them one more time.